To what degree have you actually controlled the life you are living?
From the second that you were born into this world, you had people surrounding you who would tell you what you could and couldn’t do. Who, at the time, had a better outlook on the world and knew what you were capable of achieving and understanding. They would also be the ones to help form your life, your personality, your thoughts to an extent, and knew the limitations of your dreams. They would be the ones to praise us when we did something right, and correct us when we were wrong. At this stage of life, these guardians are crucial, but at what point do you take the reigns and start controlling your own life? Does this ever actually happen?
The first question you should ask yourself is: Do I make my own decisions?
The answer to this question is more than likely a yes. You decide what time you wake up, what you’re going to wear for the day, where you want to live etc. But lets dive a little bit deeper…
The second question you should ask yourself is: Do I let the impact of others influence my decisions?
Again, when you first read this your answer will probably be no! But take a second and actually think about this question… at any point during your life (the point where you were old enough to make your own decisions) have you let someone sway your opinion in a way to change what your decision would be? For example: If you went to college, did you go to the college you wanted to go to for the exact major that you had your heart set on? Or did you attend college because it was something you thought you had to do, or you went to the University closer to home because you didn’t want to upset your family, or did you settle on a major because you knew that after all of this, this is what would make your family happy and would still get you a job? While none of these are wrong to do, this is a prime example of letting others control your life and altering it in a way that makes them happy, not you all the time.
If you’re out of college, are you doing the dream job you’ve always wanted to do? Are you living your everyday life how you’ve always imagined it? Or are you caught up in the hamster wheel of life and just doing what you have to in order to get by?
Being an adult and having responsibilities is going to happen to everyone someday, that’s nature… but what if you could fully control which responsibilities you have? That’s the ultimate goal isn’t it? Or is it something so far fetched that you laugh at even reading it?
I’m not saying that you will be able to control every single aspect of your life. You will have to do things sometimes that maybe don’t excite you or that you weren’t planning on doing that day, but overall, you would have the reigns. You would go to the college that you want to go to, no matter how it makes your family feel, you will do ultimately what makes you happy in every aspect. You deserve this, this is YOUR life, not your families, or friends, or boyfriend/girlfriend… YOURS!
So, below I have put together some ideas for you to gain back control of your life and to start you in the direction of living how you want to rather than how others want you to. You deserve to be fully in control of the life that you are living.
- Learn to say “No”
Don’t feel like you always have to do everything for others, especially who in most cases wouldn’t do the same for you. I am not saying to always say no, because it is nice to be someone that others can depend on, but be true to yourself and your priorities before giving them an answer.
- Do one thing at a time
By multitasking constantly to get things done, in the end, you are using way more time than by completing each one individually before moving to the next. Some studies show that this amount of time lost can be up to 25%.
- Be strict with your “ME” time
Dedicate time each day, or maybe one full day a week to yourself and to doing the things in life that truly make you happy. Once setting your amount of time or your day, stick to it with no excuses.
- Grasp what your life is trying to teach you
At the point when you feel like you simply cannot take it anymore, instead of reading this as in invitation to stop and to take a break, take it as a sign to just push a little bit further and to embrace the lesson being provided to you. More often than not, breakdowns lead to amazing breakthroughs.
- Become accustomed to trying new things.
Now that you have your “me” time determined, why not use this opportunity to do the things you’ve always wanted? With every new thing you try, you not only open the possibility of finding new activities that you enjoy, but you will see that you will continue to grow more as a person.
While these are only five of many steps that one could take, these are the most crucial ones and also the ones that don’t require a complete life change. Remember, your life is YOURS, don’t let anyone else control the amazing life that you are able to live!