Going through life, things can get a bit hectic at times, or maybe all of the time. We get so caught up in what we are doing that we forget to take the time to just relax, and think things through fully. The 10 things I have listed below are things that we all know, but we don’t think about on the daily basis in order to have a happier more clear way of thinking as well as life itself. My hope for you is that by reading these, you will be able to relieve some of the weight that you are carrying at this moment. That you will be able to breathe a little better, and that you will be able to put a smile on your face and realize that this stress is not a feeling that you have to constantly put up with. So, with that being said, grab a cup of coffee or a glass of wine and enjoy the clarity…
Everyone’s Journey Is Different
This statement is a ‘duh’ of course, but lets look a little more into it. Every single person has a different way of living his or her life, –I talked about this in a previous post-titled “Are You Truly Unique”- and while we all know this inside, it is not something that we think about everyday. Mostly because we tend to focus more on our life and keeping everything together and on track… which is normal and expected. But, throughout each day, we see people getting scolded, yelled at, and even judged for whatever they may be doing. The man or woman who is doing the scolding is upset because the other person is not doing something exactly to their standard, which again, is clear as to why they would react in this way. However, this is the point where you have to realize that what your standard is, for whatever the case may be, is not the same as the person standing next to you. Therefore, yelling and judging them, while it may be a nice release for you, does absolutely nothing. Instead of yelling at this other person, maybe try a different approach, by suggesting a new way to do the task at hand, or maybe ask them why they did it that way. This way, you are not only helping someone, but you are gaining knowledge yourself and you will be able to better understand people.
The Past Cannot Be Changed
“If I had only done (this) then (that) wouldn’t have happened!” How many times have you heard this sentence, or have you said it yourself. Of course after an event has happened and the brain has had some time to process everything, it’s easy to think about what could have been done to change the outcome. But, unfortunately, what happened happened, and there is nothing that you can do to change it. I’m a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. Whether I like what happened or not I tell myself that I have to accept it and keep moving forward. By stewing on it for too long will only hurt me in the end and bring me down. Of course these thoughts will always go through your mind, and I’m not telling you to block them out completely. I just want you to tell yourself that in this moment there is absolutely nothing that you can do to change the outcome. The best thing to do is to remember those thoughts in case the situation was to occur again. By doing this, you relieve the guilt that you have and be able to continue growing into a stronger, and happier version of yourself.
Overthinking Will Lead To Sadness
Overthinking is very easy to do. Our brain is filled with so many thoughts and once it selects a topic, it tends to want to think it all the way through from every angle. I will admit, I overthink a lot… too much at times actually, but I can see that it begins to create problems that weren’t even there in the first place and it makes me sad and upset. If something is beginning to bother you, for example: someone said something to you and you’re not quite sure how to take it, the easiest and simplest thing to do is to ask them. Go straight to the source. It’s not worth losing the time of happiness that you could be encountering. Plus, then you know and you it won’t have to be a thought that is constantly coming forward in your mind. You will be able to silence it and move forward. If you find yourself overthinking, focus on your breathing. Allow each breath in to think about what it is that your overthinking about, and each breath that you release as letting that thought go and leave your mind. This is a technique that I use myself and it works wonders. You begin to see that what you are overthinking about is just minor situations in the realm of your whole life, and the importances of them are miniscule. Try it out and let your mind think clearly once again.
Positive Thoughts Create Positive Outcomes
Have you ever noticed that if you tell yourself that you can do something it usually happens? Same thing for the other way around, you convince yourself that you are not capable of doing something and then that thing ultimately doesn’t get done. This is because our mind believes whatever it is we decide to tell it. If you have a goal or something that you really want to accomplish, if you tell yourself that it is doable, and you take the initiative that is needed for completion, it will become a reality. Effort of course is needed too, but the first step is always convincing yourself that you are more than able to do it. Aside from physical tasks, just waking up with a positive mind and a smile on your face ready to face the day ahead of you, you will see that the way others respond is more enlightening and more happy as well. You will see that things will just fall into place, and things will begin to just happen even better than you expected.
You Only Fail If You Quit
The easiest thing to do when trying something and it doesn’t go right the first time is to give up and tell your self that it is not possible to do. But just because it doesn’t go right the first time or maybe even the second time is quitting really the answer? By quitting, you are allowing something to defeat you. You are allowing this task to over power you and belittle you in a sense. Not everything you encounter is going to go right the first time around, in fact if it does then most likely something will go wrong in the future. Things take time and experience. You have to do things wrong in order to find out what works and what doesn’t work, what needs to be fixed and what is ready to go. Don’t convince yourself that you are not capable of completing this because it didn’t go how you expected the first time, try and try again. Once your task becomes a success, the level of proudness you will feel for yourself is the best reward out there.
Smiles Are Contagious
Something so simple and yet so beautiful is a smile. Everyone always looks better when they have a smile on their face. Not only because you can see that this person is happy, but also because in return it is a gift to you, a chance for you to express your happiness as well. You see people smiling everyday, and if you haven’t noticed before you certainly will now, that once you see a smile you end up with one. It’s a comforting feeling that even a stranger has this power over you, this power to control this emotion for you without you fully realizing it. Even on your darkest days just seeing a smile or smiling for yourself will lift you up. So, next time you see someone who is down, I encourage you to smile at them, not in a creepy way of course, but as a notion to express to them that they’re allowed to be happy even if they aren’t feeling this at that moment. That just by smiling, some of the pain and worry will begin to fade away and they will be okay.
Things Always Get Better With Time
When something goes wrong, we immediately think that the world is ending, and we question how we will ever go on living without this person or object. But I promise you, you can, and in time you will see this is true. Maybe you have had a serious break up in the past, your significant other and you were together for six years and then one day, for whatever the reason may be, you split up. You were living together, had a dog together and being apart of each others life was a routine that you were in sync with. Now, all of that has changed and you aren’t sure where to go from here. Take some time to recuperate yourself, to allow yourself to process everything and to deal with it. You are allowed this. But make sure that this doesn’t drag on for longer than it needs to. You have to remember that before this person came into your life, you were doing just fine. Of course having them there was amazing as well, but you will eventually find someone else to can provide this same feeling for you. Until then, you do what you need to do for yourself. Allow yourself to become the strong independent person you were once again. Yes this will not happen in the course of a week… but with time, it will be okay, you will be stronger, and you will continue living. I promise.
Opinions Don’t Define Your Reality
As a society, we value the opinions of others. Whether it’s if our outfit looks okay, which car we should buy, what people think of our friends and so on. But just because you are asking someone for their opinion, doesn’t mean that your own should change. Yes you should listen to and respect the opinion since you did ask for it, but it is just an opinion. The opinions of others shouldn’t affect your life to the point where you feel that you have to change who you are as a person in order to impress everyone else. Not everything you wear people will like, not ever car you drive will be a favorite, and not everyone will like every friend you have. This is nature. You have to accept this for what it is and just continue to be you. You can ask for opinions, but always stay true to your own.
Happiness Is Found Within
You look around you and you can see happy people everywhere, and then you ask yourself, “why can’t I be as happy as them?” but you can be! Happiness is all a matter of perspective. If you keep your feelings bottled up inside for periods of times, of course this is going to weigh your overall happiness down. You are preventing yourself form letting go and moving on and being happy for yourself and your accomplishments. Until you can let go of the negative thoughts and feelings, you will continue trying to convince yourself that you are happy. If there is something in your life that keeps you from this, then maybe it is time for a change to occur. Once you create your own happiness within, you will be able to freely express this for the rest of the world to see.
Kindness Is Free
Being kind is not as difficult as people try to make it seem. It’s an emotion that we all are more than able to show, but only few tend to express. Kind people tend to be happier; they want everyone around them to be happy as well. They’re the type of people who want the best for every person no matter what they have done in their lives. Being kind doesn’t take a lot of effort. In fact, it takes way more effort to be rude or mean. It’s a trait that we are born with and that can do a lot of good for the world that we live in. I’m not saying to be overly kind, or to be fake, but don’t be afraid to be nice to those around you who may need it. It doesn’t cost anything and it makes a world of difference in the lives of those around you.